I used to have an alias name when I first started blogging.

Why?

More like because I’m quite a private person, don’t feel comfortable in revealing myself in front of people I don’t know :p

Cause my blog is my personal space where I keep my personal thoughts and opinions (which I have soo many) in almost about anything and everything.

I sometimes have different opinions on one same subjects and since I find it hard to make others understand me, I blog to make me understand myself better coz by writing it down, I get to know my own value systems, things that matter the most to me, my unconscious mind and so many other things I don’t realize before.

Back to alias.. Come to think of it, I have a very common (real) name and most of my friends in ‘real’ world don’t blog so it’s a slim chance I get to meet someone I know in person in the blogging world, ahaha :p

Is it pretending?

Hmm..

I think I need to look up at the dictionary again to find out the meaning of “pretend”, why?

We can’t pretend to be someone we’re not.

Even when we’re on undercover and using a name which doesn’t belong to us, the opionions are ours, it’s from our minds, experiences and even imaginations.

It doesn’t belong to someone else.

And I do think we have a lot of different side within us.

We’re a complex human being.

We might have lots of opinion on one topic and our opinions might change from time to time.

That doesn’t mean that we’re lying cause at times me might see things from different perspectives.

I used to think that a person who changed their opinions a lot is hmm.. what’s the English word for “plin plan”? :p

But now..

I don’t think it’s wrong to change opinions quite regularly.

People might say that you don’t stand your grounds.

But when you already know that what you were once believed was wrong, should you keep that strong in hand?

Waitt..

Keep focus on the alias, Indah, ahahaha :p

Geezz.. it’s hard to focus on discussing one thing only, hihihi.. since my mind seems always jump from one topic to another randomly.

Anywayy..

After “hiding” behind my alias name for sometime..

I become quite uncomfortable.

It was like the “Indah” in me tried to come out to the surface.

I mean..

Either Indah or my alias name, the person is the same, me, only use different name.

But somehow it feels like..

They knew me..

But.. not the “real” me..

Again..

It wasn’t like I was lying when I was behind my alias name.

I meant what I said and I said what I meant.

But still..

It felt like they were accepting an illusion of me.

That “alias” is me but somehow we’re so separated from each other.

Am I talking any sense here? :p

Btw, I have a similar kind of story related to this topic but I’ll tell you about that some other time.

Right now..

I want to play games!! Ahahahaha 😀

See yaa..

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